First and foremost, I’m irreverent. About nearly everything. Now that I think about it, I’m irreverent about everything. As you might imagine, this is not a trait everyone appreciates in me. But I like it. It keeps things in perspective.
I grew up a worrier. About everything. My first husband said, “If Carol doesn’t have something to worry about, she’ll make something up.” That was many years of therapy ago. Now, I just make jokes.
To be honest, when it comes to my son, I make the jokes after the need for worry is over. He asked once, when I wouldn’t let him do something he wanted to do, “Why are you such a bad Mom?” Ten minutes later, he came back and asked, “Ok, why are you such a GOOD Mom?” So I have it on good authority that I’m a good Mom, and I like that about myself. It took a lot of work.
I appreciate my commitment to making the world a better place. Cue the trumpets. Most often, that is done one on one, but sometimes I get the chance to reach out and touch larger groups, as an activist, public speaker, and writer. Medium helps with that.
What making the world a better place really boils down to, is treating everyone the way you want to be treated. Unless you’re a masochist. Then do the opposite.
To do what I do as a psychotherapist, I have to have compassion and empathy. I also have to know on a deep level that I can’t and don’t control anyone. Everyone has a right to make their own decisions. My job is to help them know themselves well enough to make those decisions. And maybe help them develop some compassion for others along the way. That was part of my job as a Mom, too.
I appreciate the part of me that seeks experiences. It’s led me to many an adventure. Some of those were less thought out, and certainly not as safe, as others. Occasionally I write about some of those. Stay tuned if you’re interested.
It’s also facilitated travel and activities with my son that he will remember long after I’m gone, and possessions have worn out. Living moment to moment is the most important part of Mindfulness. The paradoxical result of living moment to moment is creating amazing memories.
If I don’t get dementia, (it does not run in the family) I will have a stockpile of memories. If I do, then my fervent wish is that I also keep my irreverence. I’ve laughed at myself and in the face of adversity my whole life. That and Mindfulness have gotten me this far.
Thanks to Peter Crowe.
—
Previously published on “Change Becomes You”, a Medium publication.
—
***
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want to join our calls on a regular basis, please join us as a Premium Member, today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
Talk to you soon.
—
Photo credit: aw creative on Unsplash
.